7 Weirdest Shooters from the 1990s That Make Even Less Sense Now

Published 3 months ago by Jane Douglas

What the FPS

After Wolfenstein 3D in 1992, the 90s became a golden age for first-person shooters. That's not to say that every 1990s FPS was a classic. Countless shooters made it to market that were weird, baffling, or starred William Shatner. Watch on for our favourite weird genre relics from that baffling era of games.

Back in the 1990s, shooters were conceived a lot like romantic comedies, in that you could theme them around anything, regardless of how stupid the end product would end up being.

So step forward Christmas Carnage, the Love Actually of 90s FPSes, which thought it was a good idea to cash in on the holiday season by having you murder a bunch of seasonally themed things to a jaunty midi soundtrack.

Forbes Corporate Warrior from 1997, on the other hand, is set in the distant future year 2006 and imagines a world in which corporate warfare is a term to be taken literally.

In Forbes Corporate Warrior, players could battle rival companies through the use of a VR device known as the DSMI helmet, taking market share and growing their own stock price by firing cash at their competitors? We're not sure that's how business works.

Then consider Super Noah's Ark 3D from 1994: a shooter based on the biblical tale of amateur boat-builder Noah, as much as 2012 sci-fi action flick Battleship was based on the Mattel board game Battleship. (Not very.)

For starters, the book of Genesis never had pre-flood Patriarch Noah roaming around his Ark, collecting fruit and shooting angry animals with food to make them fall asleep.

And if we know our Old Testament, it was TWO of every kind of animal on the Ark, whereas Super Noah's Ark 3D populates the Ark with, we estimate, eight thousand goats. As a bible study tool it is, shall we say, unreliable.

Previously on Outside Xbox: Show of the Week: Doom and 5 Retro Shooters They Should Remake Right Now

About the author

Jane Douglas
Jane is co-editor at Outside Xbox, where she writes words and makes videos. She enjoys dialogue trees.

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